Key questions to ask your family law solicitor in your first meeting

14th June 2024

If you feel nervous about your initial consultation with a solicitor, you are not alone. It is a big first step and it can feel like you’re setting the official wheels in motion. Whether you’ve spent time researching your options or are acting on a recommendation from friends or family, this is your opportunity to meet the real people who could be accompanying you on your legal journey. Here we reveal the important questions you should be asking, along with our top tips for unlocking the full potential of your first meeting.

Meeting aims

You may well be offered a free initial consultation with a solicitor and these meetings are understandably time limited. However, first meetings are still crucial and you want to make the most of the time you have. After you’ve exchanged pleasantries and explained your circumstances, try to use the time left to explore those questions you really want them to answer.

 At the very least, the meeting should:

  • set out how the solicitor will work with you
  • offer an early insight into your legal options
  • give you advice on first steps
  • outline the likely costs, expenses and payment options
  • provide answers to any reasonable questions

Remember, your first meeting doesn’t commit you to taking matters forward or to working with this particular solicitor. It’s all about gathering information. With so much to ‘cram in’ and try to discover, preparing information beforehand is essential. This will also give you more time to ask questions and gain more insight.

What to prepare?

Before your first meeting, a solicitor will ask for the details of other people involved. This is to ensure that they aren’t already acting for the other party and to ensure that there are no conflicts of interest in acting for you. In the case of a break-up, you would provide your partner’s details.

 You should also prepare the following information – you won’t need to show it all or discuss everything in your preliminary meeting, but you will need all of it once you start working together, so it’s good to have it all in one place and ready:

  1. Two forms of identification (for anti-money laundering processes)
  2. Proof of address (such as a utility bill)
  3. A brief explanation of your issues
  4. A chronology of key dates
  5. In the case of divorce, a summary of your financial assets
  6. A copy of any relevant documentation, such as solicitors’ letters received, court orders, upcoming hearings or pre-nuptial agreements
  7. A list of the key questions you want answered – this blog should help!
  8. You may choose to send a short email in advance of the meeting, setting out your issues and objectives, the key dates and details of your financial assets. The solicitor can take a quick look beforehand which will save time. Remember to keep it brief and be sure to include the key points.

If you have all sorts of things swishing around in your head before the meeting, it can be useful to bring a friend or family member along for support. They can listen carefully (and potentially from a less emotional standpoint) and make helpful notes for you to look back on after the meeting.

Objectives and priorities

It’s very easy to become wrapped up in explaining events or seeking and listening to advice during an initial consultation. This can sometimes stop you communicating your own needs and wishes as clearly as you’d like. Take some time before you meet to think about your short-term and longer-term objectives. What are your priorities and concerns? Think about them and write them down in advance of the meeting.

 For example, in the case of a parent getting divorced:

 Do you want your children to live with you? If not, how much time would you want to spend with them each week?

Is staying in your current home important?

Do you have specific concerns about you or your children’s welfare?
Are you already in communication with any other organisations (for example, Children’s Services or the police)?
Whatever your issues, objectives and priorities are, be sure to communicate them clearly in your first meeting. Giving your potential solicitor this insight is vital in helping them to meet your needs and to answer your questions with context.

 Good first questions:

 Will you be handling my case?
 Find out who will principally be working on your case and who you would communicate with on a day-to-day basis.

What’s your experience of handling cases like mine?
Whilst a solicitor cannot disclose details of other cases, they should be able to tell you about their expertise working on similar family law cases. This may be particularly important if your issues are unusual or require specialist knowledge. Specialist solicitors may also tell you about the other in-house expertise they can call upon to support you..

What methods of communication do you use and how often will you update me?
Today, most solicitors will communicate with you securely by email. They can also send official correspondence by email. Use this opportunity to explain any specific communication preferences. Maybe you need to receive correspondence another way? Can you ring up and speak to them if you have questions?

What are my options?
If you’re in dispute, there can be many different processes to resolve the issues. Once you’ve provided a summary of your case, your solicitor should outline the appropriate options available to you.

Remember that their focus should be on working constructively. If they don’t mention them, ask the solicitor if they facilitate other forms of alternative dispute resolution like mediation. Going to court is certainly not an inevitability and your solicitor should offer alternative options for finding a resolution.

What timescales should I expect?
Knowing timescales is very helpful in managing your own expectations. Divorce, for example, follows a set process, and the time between each stage can vary, depending on how long it takes the parties to resolve any issues that arise. Your solicitor should give you an idea of the time it will take to complete and formalise the outcome of your case, with the caveat that this could still change as you move through the process.

What are your costs and payment options?
The all-important question of cost must be raised and discussed in the first meeting.

Does the solicitor charge hourly rates? If so, what are they?

What other costs or expenses could you encounter along the way ?

What are their terms of payment?

 It’s vital that you are fully aware of the costs and assess whether you can afford them before you commit.

 You may have other very specific questions related to your case and you should never feel embarrassed or afraid to ask them. When it comes to family law, there is no such thing as a silly question! And, if time permits, your solicitor should endeavour to answer you. Solicitors understand their role to provide clarity as you move through legal proceedings. Like all new or unfamiliar processes, it's totally natural that you’ll have some questions. Your solicitor should encourage you to share your concerns and queries and be able to provide answers as you walk the path together.

 Remember that in some cases they may not have ‘all the answers’, because it’s too early to give definitive ones. It’s also worth bearing in mind that family law is a discretionary branch of law with many different types of solution. Predicting an outcome in a first meeting – or giving more than a rough idea of timescales – could be both difficult and unwise.

 After the meeting:

 Don’t rush to commit before you’ve had time to reflect on the meeting. Read your notes and ask yourself: Does the person have the legal expertise and experience you need? Did you have a good rapport with them? Did they explain the legal side of things clearly? And can you afford their services? Importantly, did you walk away feeling listened to and well-informed?

 If you have any follow-up questions, you could email them or telephone the solicitor’s office. Remember that there could be some charges for follow-up advice, so it’s wise to ask about them first.

 Many situations where someone needs a family law solicitor are highly-charged, emotional, difficult or upsetting. A good first meeting with a good solicitor should reassure you that they know what they are talking about and that you are in safe hands.

 At K J Smith Solicitors, we take the time to listen and get to know you. We offer a free initial consultation to find out about your unique priorities and objectives. Our work is always specific to you. We want to empower you by providing the right information at the right time. Moreover, we want you to leave that first meeting with a comprehensive understanding of who we are, how we can help, and those important first steps.

 Book your free 45-minute initial consultation with us at KJS. We’re ready to answer your questions and illuminate the path ahead.

Awards & Recognitions

We’re recognised by the Legal 500 as a Leading Firm in a number of practice areas. That means that an external, objective body has scrutinised our competency and client reviews, and found us to be one of the top family law practices in the UK.

Our lawyers are members of Resolution, so we are committed to a Code of Practice which promotes a constructive approach to family issues that considers the needs of the whole family.

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